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Secret sales techniques, NLP and getting someone to buy you dinner

You are here: Home / Blog / Secret sales techniques, NLP and getting someone to buy you dinner

March 26, 2012 By Renée Leave a Comment

I ran two training sessions last week that focussed on building rapport with clients, and the teams I worked with had fun discussing body language and verbal clues over a platter of my home baked honey cakes.  Then on Thursday, I was called a cake slut!!  Been called worse, but not for some time.  I can publicly state that there’s nothing wrong with dumping the lemon meringue tarts for banana honeycomb with choc chip.  Anyway, I’m glad the word cake was included – whatever would my new followers think!!  Although I should mention at this point that in my next life I plan to come back as a Mosuo woman! If you’ve never heard of them, I suggest you Google – and quick.  I learned about them from a scene in The Good Wife – ironic, really, when you see what they get up to.

Anyway, the training involved neuro-linguistic programming – NLP, which has long been a favourite technique of sales people.  In fact I first heard of it from Leigh Ashton when she spoke so impressively at a Women Entrepreneurs’ workshop that I attended many moons ago at a London university.  Learning preferences influence the way we think and the words we choose – yet, like most of our emotional reflexes, we’re oblivious to these behind the scenes actions of our brains.  And likewise, we don’t pay attention to the ways in which we mirror the person sitting opposite us (behind the candle and the bottle of rosé), or across the boardroom table.  Many a deal has been shaken on as a direct result of legs being crossed in the right direction and mutual pen fidgeting. 

Successful sales people are intrinsically conditioned to pick up on body language signals to determine how well a meeting is going, and can swiftly adapt their pitch to bring a disinterested potential client back onto the ‘I want it’ track. I also know a few men who are good at that on a Friday night.  (And I don’t mean my friend who this Friday mixed beer, lager, Guinness, red wine and a mojito!!)  NLP experts use spoken clues to do the same thing.  If you haven’t encountered this secret method before, here’s a peek: Visual people will tell you “That looks good…” Auditory clients will say “Sounds great” and kinesthetic folk will think “It feels right.”  (Two things for Deedub to Google this week.)  I’ll tell you more about this in a few weeks – it’s one of my most requested training sessions in effective communication skills. Once my new website is up and running I’m planning to give out some free stuff, maybe some tips on recognising these subtle language signals – very useful for closing business deals or getting someone to buy you dinner…

So if you ever can’t find me, it’s probably because someone’s buying me dinner.  Or cake.  Or I’m out to lunch…  If there’s food, I’ll be there.  “Build my world of dreams around you, I’m so glad that I’ve found you.”  Or if you’ve already found me, why aren’t you following me?  Here I am: @WeekendWitch

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Renée is an amazing writer who is the author of some fantastic blogs… very informal and conversational, she talks TO the reader rather than at them. She uses a lot of humour, she doesn't take herself too seriously and isn't scared to laugh at herself; a bit of naughtiness included too for added spice(!)… I asked Renee to help me understand SEO and how to improve my site. We had a one to one session in which she explained in detail everything I needed to know. Her explanation was clear and fully understandable, which was great for me as I had no previous knowledge of SEO or social marketing. I left our meeting confident of what I needed to do in order to boost my site, which is exactly what I wanted to gain from the session... Renée is the most friendly and professional person I have ever worked with. She is an asset to any company and brings a new insight into training. I would strongly recommend Renée to any company wishing to grow and to improve staff performance… Renee is the ultimate networker and is happy to share her contacts for the benefit of others. She is very knowledgeable and has a great network of contacts... Renée creates fantastic web content and writes our twice-weekly blog. Being results-driven, she has succeeded in increasing traffic referrals to our website and raising us swiftly through Google rankings. She also runs our social media marketing campaigns effectively and handles all related staff training in a relaxed and lively manner. She’s great to work with and bakes nice cakes!... I have received great compliments about Renée from those attending the Mildmay Job Clubs... Renée has made valued contributions to our key School Policies (such as The Equality and Diversity policy and The Learning and Teaching policy). She is extremely professional, she has a great eye for detail and can empathise with the target audience. She ensures what is written is a true reflection of what is going to happen or what needs to be said whilst encompassing all stakeholders in the process... Renée’s writing is clear and concise and we have used this in our accountancy practice to produce professional letters to our clients that they can understand. All our team are unanimous when we say Renee is a pleasure to work with and we are looking forward to continuing our strong relationship... A professional and well organised outfit that exceeded expectations. Excellent feedback from the client group who asked for more of the same... Renée has a very good reputation among learners and staff. Her learners benefitted from her expertise. She has a very good outcome from her learners. We are very happy to have Renée as part of our team at Redbridge Institute of Adult Education... Renée has a very relaxed style and is able to get on with colleagues at all levels. She is able to engage very diverse audiences when training, which she delivers in a very user-friendly way. I am more than happy to talk to any potential clients…Personable, expert, high integrity... Delegates came away from the training sessions with vital new skills and a better understanding of how they could communicate more clearly… Renée was able to run these sessions in such a way as to make them both informative and enjoyable. I was remarkably impressed with Renee’s professionalism and expertise and can honestly say that she helped us achieve 100% of the targets we had set ourselves. I would have no hesitation in recommending her… Renée demonstrates outstanding oral presentation skills and has an enthusiastic approach to the subject which promotes motivation and participation between learners... Highly effective identification of individuals' learning needs, excellent support provided as appropriate: one-to-one or as a group...
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